Australian Penthouse

Cask wine: the preserve of winos and uni students or the next big thing in quality plonk? Ben Canaider samples 75 casks (237 litres) in his unyielding quest for enlightenment…

If you think cask wine is battery acid, consider that 48 per cent of wine consumed in Australia is appreciated from a cask. Fair enough; we invented the Château de Cardboard delivery system way back in 1965, when Angove’s in South Australia put a plastic bag full of wine in a box. More than 40 years on, and with a few tweaks, the cask remains with us.

Although nowadays there are far fewer wine makers using casks (or keen to be associated with them); casks have an image problem. The posh wine line is that cask wines are for plonkos, and that if you and Marjorie want to holiday on the French Riviera, then you had better start drinking wine out of a bottle, from a glass…

But who gives a stuff about the packaging if the wine inside is good?

In Penthouse’s relentless quest for the truth, we conducted—in laboratory-like conditions—a tasting of 75 different casks, in two-litre, four-litre, and five-litre formats: approximately 237 litres all up. And in increasing proportions, it was a clear case of the good, the bad, and the downright ugly.

In judging the wines, I used the International Cask Wine Rating System, which goes from -3 to +3 (and which I just invented): At the low end, -3 is toxic wine that should not be near the mouth; in the middle is 0, which is an inoffensive drop; and +3 is a wine so good you’ll probably never find it in a cask.

So, to the wines…

Yalumba Premium Cabernet Shiraz
2 litres – $15
Blends of different grape varieties often make for the best cask wine recipe. This cabernet/shiraz combo gives you cabernet’s tannin and shiraz’s earthy fruitiness. And it takes no prisoners.
Score: +2

Yalumba Premium Cabernet Merlot
2 litres – $15
‘Structure’… There’s a wine-wanker term par excellence. It means the drink has a beginning, a middle and an end, as far as its flavour goes. This wine has structure. In cricketing terms, we’d say good line and length. Nice wine. Score: +2

Yalumba Premium Pinot Grigio 2008
2 litres – $15
Yalumba do a large range of these two-litre jobs, all identified by a grape variety, and many of them made from one vintage, hence this 2008 white. Described as “a light-bodied, fresh white wine”, it’s spot on. It’s dry, there’s no smell, and virtually no flavour. It’s clean, neutral white. Score: +2

Coolabah Dolce Bianco Lambrusco
4 litres – $14
A totally inoffensive not-too-sweet and not-too-monsterish white that comes in a proper cask
wine size and really looks the part. It even has
a silly name. Perfect for a birthday punch—the drink, not the jab to the arm. Score: 0

Banrock Station Shiraz Cabernet
2 litres – $16
‘Balance’… Another wine-wanker word. This time it’s about the combination of fruit flavour, alcohol burn, acid and tannin (the mouth-puckering effect of red wine—like sucking on a tea bag). This wine is balanced. Score: +2

Morris Blanc Superior
4 litres – $15
While the Coolabah looks like a cask ought to,
this Morris white has the poshest name around
—’Blanc Superior’. Clearly a name that resounds with quality, if you ask me; however, the wine
itself is pleasantly unremarkable in every regard. Score: 0

Morris Pressings Dry Red
4 litres – $19
For about two decades, this Morris Pressings has been the bee’s knees of red casks. It’s still good, with some depth, grip, and solid flavour. When you convert it to a bottle price of about $4 a go,
it sounds even better. Score: +1

The following styles and blends of cask wine should be avoided at all costs…

* Anything labelled ‘soft and fruity’
* Anything labelled ‘Fruity Lexia’
* Anything that claims to be a kind of port, tawny port, or old tawny port.
NOTE: All are completely undrinkable.

With casks, remember that whites are no better than reds, and two-litre casks are not necessarily better than four-litres. You have been informed, and duly warned.

Ben Canaider is a typist who drinks. He writes about wine and other alcoholic beverages for numerous magazines: www.bencanaider.com­­