Australian Penthouse

Ben Canaider’s five easy steps to building your own esky…

ESKIES are a natural part of life. We all need them; we all benefit from them; we all want one. But they can cost real money nowadays. Which is why I turned my attention to hard rubbish. Not to find old eskies, but to find an old bar fridge. Eskies found in hard rubbish are always busted up and broken.

Fridges, on the other hand, are structurally sound. It’s just that—for whatever reason—they don’t plug in and chill things anymore. This makes a discarded fridge a walk-up starter to become an esky. The outer casing, or shell, of a bar fridge is invariably tougher than that of an esky—also, its hinges and insulation are thicker and stronger, making them better at keeping things cool. So, let’s get busy…

Step 1: Find a suitable fridge. Hard rubbish collections are perfect; otherwise get to know a friendly tip operator. I found a Fisher & Paykel 100-litre bar fridge in hard rubbish in a posh suburb of Melbourne. The compressor was stuffed, but, boy, what an esky it’ll make!

Step 2: Rip everything out…almost. Remove the back-of-house material (e.g. the stuffed compressor, electrical cable, feet). Streamline the interior of the fridge to taste. Remember, the goal is to recreate the interior of an esky. This can be achieved with a minimum of tools —pliers, cutters, screwdrivers and spanners. You don’t need much of an armoury to decommission a fridge.

Step 3: Silicone. Yes, silicone is fantastic stuff. Run a bead of it over any of the drain points created by your cable removal in Step 2. You need to make the future esky watertight so you don’t lose any ice/water slurry from your new best friend.

Step 4: Handles. Put a lifting handle on the front and two carrying handles on either end. Finally, for a touch of class and occasion, add fluffy dice or a disco ball to the upper inside of the lid (formerly known as ‘the door’).

Step 5: Officially commission your new esky with choice beverages and ice. Personally, I like to give these hard-rubbish eskies a name. Often, I name them after the street I find them on. This little fella is called ‘Hawthorn’.

I would like to thank camera-shy Phil the Phriendly Phridge Mechanic for his assistance in preparing this classy esky conversion.

A new, 100-litre esky will cost you top dough—potentially as much as $350—but a lovingly customised, hard-rubbish bar fridge will provide you with a bullet-proof unit for the price of a tube of silicone, some handles and fluffy dice. Plus, you’re saving a fridge from the scrap yard. You can also further customise your fridge-esky by adding castor wheels, a bottle opener on a chain, an ashtray, or perhaps even a USB port, making the fridge Internet-ready.

Ben Canaider is a typist who drinks: www.bencanaider.com

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